I feel like throwing up....

Qbert

Qbert

Well-Known Member
Sep 11, 2013
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not sure if anyone recalls, but I've been planning on moving to GA this summer, currently living in FL.

For a long time, my wife and I have been planning this move. We got a realtor, we started cleaning out our garage and cleaning up the house.



Here comes the throw up part....my wife is having second thoughts about moving, she feels established here, she made friends, she loves the church we go to, etc. I........I........I hate it here. I don't want to pull her away from what she's getting used to, but I'm not sure if I'll ever get used to it here.

We were planning on driving out to GA this Wednesday, but now she's wondering if we should just use the money to get disney tickets for the girls. DISNEY!!!!!!!!!!!!! uggghhhhh.



I don't know who to talk to, my heart is racing, I'm all nerves right now.
 
Why are you planning to move to GA? Job? Sometime, moving to other state and make a lot of new friends can be a blessing.
 
Came in here to post this since I thought you were feeling ill.

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Read your story and decided to post this instead.

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Smurfboy said:
Why are you planning to move to GA? Job? Sometime, moving to other state and make a lot of new friends can be a blessing.
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No, not job. I work from home. I actually lived in alpharetta, GA for 3 years, and left to be closer to family. I still have that same job from GA (where the office is), but they allowed me to work from home.

I just don't like it here. It's a crummy place, it's in a decline economically, socially, etc. however, it's only saving grace is that our priest works with families to put the children in catholic school with a good amount of tuition assistance given.

My wife feels that between that, going to a good church, having made friends, etc....that she could overlook the ills of Palm Bay, Fl....I, on the other hand, am fearful of staying in a place where the economy is only getting worse, crime getting worse, etc.



I want out, but would hate for my wife to be resentful if I take her away from here.
 
It's time to lay down the law. Tell her it's your way or the highway.

Then when she leaves get on your knees and beg her to come back.
 
Qbert said:
No, not job. I work from home. I actually lived in alpharetta, GA for 3 years, and left to be closer to family. I still have that same job from GA (where the office is), but they allowed me to work from home.

I just don't like it here. It's a crummy place, it's in a decline economically, socially, etc. however, it's only saving grace is that our priest works with families to put the children in catholic school with a good amount of tuition assistance given.

My wife feels that between that, going to a good church, having made friends, etc....that she could overlook the ills of Palm Bay, Fl....I, on the other hand, am fearful of staying in a place where the economy is only getting worse, crime getting worse, etc.



I want out, but would hate for my wife to be resentful if I take her away from here.
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Sounds like that's a very difficult and sticky situation to consider about. I guess that's between you and wife to discuss about what to do next. Is it worth it? Is it absolutely necessary for us to move to other place? Can we afford to keep up with everything? Stuff like that.
 
Pretty natural to have second thoughts before a big move. Otoh, it sounds like you guys were in agreement before, and now she's changed her mind. You'll need to talk it through some more, come to a real, solid agreement that neither of you will waver on. Easier said than done, I'm sure.
 
Yeah, it is easier said than done. She doesn't like it here either, but she's afraid of going over to GA and finding that she doesn't make the connection with church/friends like here.

It all started with her going to the catholic highschool's open house the week before last. Wish she never went.
 
Is there a way you can test-drive it first, e.g., rent an apartment there for a few months, see how you like it?
 
Anderson said:
Is there a way you can test-drive it first, e.g., rent an apartment there for a few months, see how you like it?
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Here's the thing....our daughter starts highschool this year. Whatever we do, we want it to be our final move for a long time. THe last thing I'd want is to move, put her in school over there, then pull her out and put her in another school.

I know we'll like it over there, we lived there, and we loved it. She's just unsure about making the connections part.
 
Qbert said:
I know we'll like it over there, we lived there, and we loved it. She's just unsure about making the connections part.
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If it's just the connections you're worried about, then no problem. Craigslist, ad entitled "Looking for friends". That'll attract a lot of colorful characters.
 
I personal think she needs to step in faith and try to move to a new place to see how it goes. Who knows, maybe from 5 years later, she'd look back and say "Why didn't I move over here much sooner?! I love it! All of my new friends are awesome!" She could always keep in connection with her old friends through facebook/email/twitter/phone, etc. It's not like they lost friends forever.
 
Don't upset the applecart until you get that V-Day PS4 in your cold dirty hands!!!
 
Oblong said:
Don't upset the applecart until you get that V-Day PS4 in your cold dirty hands!!!
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lol, I know.

I'm torn. All of our moves have been on my behest. She's finally feeling comfortable here and establishing roots, so I'd hate to be the source of her discontent in GA "if" that turns out to be the case.
We'll be 43 this year. She has friends here, and my family here. I'm sure the older we get, the harder it is to make new connections.
 
Who cares where you live as long as you're happy. Oh, you're not happy sorry I forgot...
 
Videodrome said:
Fails to understand how someone can be that attached to Florida.
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We're not, we really don't like it here. However, she's attached to the church, and we have some family here. We'll literally will start fresh in GA, which I don't mind, because imho, I think looking to the future, it's what's best.
 
Videodrome said:
Well... she wants to throw away the money on Disney. I mean really.
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It's the guilt she's having, for having lived here almost 5 years and not once have we taken the girls to disney. She doesn't like it here either, but I think that in her mind, doing things like Disney and seeing the kids enjoy themselves may lessen the blow of staying.
 
Florida also has sink holes and alligators. I mean c'mon.

http://qz.com/156144/expect-to-hear...deep-sinkholes-as-floridas-population-surges/

Every year, hundreds of new sinkholes dot Florida’s terrain. Though they’re divided on whether sinkhole incidence is increasing, scientists generally agree that Florida’s surging population means more people are encountering sinkholes. Either way, expect to be hearing a lot more about them. Scarce land in southern Florida is driving the state’s new masses straight for what’s called “Sinkhole Alley“: three counties around Tampa, in Florida’s central swath. From 2012 to 2030, populations in Hernando, Hillsborough and Pasco counties—which accounted for a combined 68% of sinkhole insurance claims (pdf, p.17) in 2010—are set to grow way faster than Florida’s overall 22% increase.
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You should print this up like a big poster

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Try explaining how you feel to her and see what she says. Does she know you hate it in FL?
 
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