Just imagine I need a Golf 1.4 l & GTi to hit 170mph on a road (which is max speed allowed). The GTi can do it without issue, so I left it as it is. The 1.4L golf was struggling, so I cleared the truck, remove the back seats, & injected premium fuel, added nitrous. Now my 1.4 Golf can also hit 170mph.
Optimisation is a bit like that. They have 'parity' as far as achieving required speed, & reaching the destination at similar time.
This does not however means the 1.4L golf is now as powerful as the GTi.
Now, X1 is a decent piece of machine, & owners need not feel defensive when compare to PS4. There will be games that will be mostly alike, there will be instances where PS4 extra power shine, & there will be rare occasions that X1 actually better (like Unity).
The reality is that the PS4 is just more power, mainly in GPU & ram. This power advantage may or may not be relevant depends on how developers wanted to approach the hardware.
-If they said, lets develop using the lowest denomination, than obviously, games on both hardware will be similar.
-If they said, lets develop using the full potential of the system, then there is a chance there are difference, could be resolution, could be fps, could be lightings etc.
-Then there is also ports or Indie games that are hardly pushing the next gen consoles, say Valiant hearts, so most time, you can get parity.
Even when PS4 performance better, it may not be apparent visually. That doesn't change teh fact that it is in fact more powerful.
MS choose whatever they are using now not because they have some secret sauces or trick tools, they picked the spec mainly because they wanted to lower price of the hardware. Its really that simple. There super smart hardware designers can only do so much given the budget.
I get it, its not helping when Sony fanboys keep stoking the console war by saying how inferior X1 is, usually exaggerating. Its not a good feeling, for sure. But at the same time, its not helping when people start pretending that the hardwares are on par (just different), when clearly the PS4 is more powerful. Thats just not truthful, or being delusional.
Like I mentioned above the extra power may not even be apparent. You can like your golf 1.4 (Maybe you appreciate the other quality of the 1.4 golf, like softer ride, & lower maintenance) & acknowledge that the GTi is faster you know, & not feel the need to defend your choice of transport,or downplay the power difference. Because if you did, it will just show that you are an insecure owner.